2010. Resolutions.

Things I wish for 2010: Turn Russian: I'd like to change my last name to something wit a 'kov' in it so I can pretend that I am russian. ex: Biriukova, Kazakova, Malenkov, and so on. To finally own a skateboard: I've been asking for one for years and no one takes me seriously. Listen, jerks, I have a passion to ride the gravel ridden streets of Mokena, IL on a skateboard. I don't want to do any of your fancy tricks, I just want to go up and down the street. I would buy one for myself, but where's the fun in that?  Think of how great, and truly happy I'd be, if you were the person who would fulfill a my destiny and four year longing for a Chanel painted longboard. To not decrease the size of my wardrobe: A few weeks ago I went downstairs to ask my mom if we had any more hangers in our house that I could use. Deb spins around, waves her hands in the air, lets the remnants of her 1993 bulls Three-peat sweatshirt fly around her arms like wings and screams in my face "WE CAN'T ACCOMODATE ANYMORE OF YOUR WARDROBE." On this note, I will absolutely be turning the spare bedroom next to mine into a second closet where she will be forced to deal with the ever increasing wardrobe I have. Look out Target, you know that I'm on my way to the store to buy out every rolling rack you have, and Hello New Year's sales, you can bet your bottom dollar I'm going to be all over the internet shopping. I'm talking to you Rodarte.  To have better posture: I think it's my generation, but I've spoken with so many people lately who are trying to improve their posture. We are a generation of hunchbacks and even though I am not reproducing, ever, I will gladly help to form the movement for better posture in this lifetime so the children of the future can stand up tall. I am available for public motivational speaking at your local high schools on this subject.  To decrease my sugar intake: Now, let's be honest, this will be the biggest challenge I have faced since ... I don't even know when. When people said I was too young to open my own store, I proved them wrong. When people said that I would not have the health to work 60 hours a week, I proved them wrong...and people have said that I cannot give up a life of candy, cakes, and cookies, but in 2010 I will prove them wrong, too! I'm going at this cold turkey, it's the best way to sever ties with something that you loved so dearly for so long. After the sudden death of Brittany Murphy I realized that I have seen my last milkshake... however later that day I went out and had a rootbeer float, but that was then, and this is TODAY! Side note for young entreprenuers: Nicorette made the Nicotine patch- discover something to ween me off of a life of sweets, you'll be rich and famous. Guaranteed. Own a musket. No explanation necessary other than it will probably come in handy when I crash on the Island.

2009 was like a really bad mix drink where you know there are good parts in it, but unfortunately all you are tasting are the more powerful bad parts. Hopefully 2010 will be filled with more happiness and peace... and no more dreams about Simon Cowell as the leader of some terrorist organizations.

<3Lauren